ext_939: Sheep wearing an eyepatch (chronographia Death Fascist Oppressors)
ext_939 ([identity profile] spiralsheep.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] picowrimo 2009-11-12 09:26 pm (UTC)

That extract of Music II is rly good and makes me want to read more (as usual).

You have two "rather"s in close proximity though:

"I'd rather not have anything nasty happen to me, and given the choice, I'd rather nothing happened to you, either."

If you intended deliberate repetitive emphasis then you might want to use a stronger word?

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