Pico day 13

[el-staplador.livejournal.com]

I'm away with work for the next couple of days. There is alleged to be wi-fi, but if I fail to get the posts up within a reasonable time please do someone feel free to step in.

Here is the post for any comments, snippets or thoughts.

May the magic be with us all!

Comments

[el-staplador.livejournal.com]

I've got wi-fi! And I'm going out to dinner with my colleagues in half an hour, so I'm going to claim poster's perks and comment first.

A couple of hundred words on the train north - I'm not going to type the whole lot up now, as I neglected to bring the memory stick with the document on, but here's a little snippet:


It took me a long time to get to sleep. Long after Jay and Emma had stopped whispering about how well the bus was running, long after Helen had fallen into a snuffly slumber, I lay awake, smelling the wood and paint and dust, snuggling deep into my sleeping bag and trying to ignore the chill that had settled into my bones, Carmen and Turandot and West Side Story running through my head, all mixed up with the excited contentment of the long day on the road, and with my conversation with Emma.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Wow! You are one industrious writer! I wish I could write on the train.

[saki101.livejournal.com]

I'm impressed with squeezing the writing in during the journey.

I can feel all the pieces swirling in your narrator's head and a burgeoning attachment. "Excited contentment" is a great description of that feeling.

[sallymn.livejournal.com]

That's well done, it always feels good to be able to use travelling time (I wish I could use a recorder when driving, but it never seems to work )

[espresso-addict.livejournal.com]

Kudos for making good use of the train journey! I love the rhythm of your long sentence, so suggestive of that stream of consciousness you get pre-sleep.

[akane42me.livejournal.com]

Wi-fi makes everything so much easier! Hooray! Congrats for writing on the train! I'd be reading and looking out the window:)

I love this snippet. I have difficulty getting to sleep, and this is just what happens - lying there aware of everything, with songs looping, tangled with bits of conversation from the day. How nice to know it's mixed up with the excited contentment of the day.

[stevie-carroll.livejournal.com]

Marvellous progress and a great snippet too.

[elmey.livejournal.com]

What a productive train ride!

A great description of that lying in bed and thoughts churning feeling.

[jenn-calaelen.livejournal.com]

Great description of trying to get to sleep - it seems very realistic.

Terminus, Chapter 7

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

I used the moderately cool morning (below 30 degrees, which is progress, compared to the previous days) and wrote half the chapter in one go. It's a short and not very complicated one, so I hope I'll finish it tomorrow, as next week promises to be rather hectic, with (finally!) closing school term and all the insanity that goes with it.

Excerpt:
In which they are trying to figure out what happened to Rina and the security guy, Burke.

The security officers were watching the proceedings in bewilderment.

“Why do you want to know where the other Vulcans have been in the last hour or so?” Aron finally asked.

“Because the bruises to Ensign Rina’s trapezoid muscle are characteristic for the trauma caused by the technique that humans have nicknamed the Vulcan neck pinch,” Selar answered calmly.

The humans stared at her somewhat shocked, but she continued on with her deductions unerringly.

“Logic dictates therefore that one of my own kind should be the primary suspect. However,” she gestured at the viewscreen, “this movement pattern shows that none of the resident Vulcans have been in that particular turbolift cabin in the last forty minutes.”

“Vulcans aren’t the only ones capable of using the neck pinch, though,” Tallman said in a tone that suggested that she, too, would be able to do so.

RE: Terminus, Chapter 7

[saki101.livejournal.com]

Terrific progress! And congratulations on being in the home stretch with school!

I particularly like that last line. Don't feel too superior, at least on that score, Vulcan one!

RE: Terminus, Chapter 7

[sallymn.livejournal.com]

Oh nice - that last line has a bit of a sting in it, which I like :)

Re: Terminus, Chapter 7

[espresso-addict.livejournal.com]

Kudos on terrific progress, despite the heat! I too like the slight edge to Tallman's comment at the end.

RE: Terminus, Chapter 7

[akane42me.livejournal.com]

You're on fire! Half a chapter today! Go, you! And good luck tomorrow with finishing it, because yes, end of year is crazy time:)

This is great: bewildered humans, calm Selar, Tallman's cryptic line! Good job!

RE: Terminus, Chapter 7

[stevie-carroll.livejournal.com]

Love Tallman there!

RE: Terminus, Chapter 7

[elmey.livejournal.com]

It's early for such heat, isn't it? Good job writing in spite of it.

This is a good scene, I like the differing personalities on display, cool deduction, a bit of pride :)

RE: Terminus, Chapter 7

[jenn-calaelen.livejournal.com]

Good deducing by Selar - I wonder if they know Data can do nerve pinches!

[stevie-carroll.livejournal.com]

More red pen edits today while I was having a coffee in the Oxford Museum of Natural History (I'd gone over there to photograph and measure-up display cases in the Pitt-Rivers and found all kinds of events going on that kept me occupied for an extra couple of hours).

No typing up, but I'll get to that eventually.

[sallymn.livejournal.com]

Sounds like my sort of day :) and at least you found time to do some work inbetween the events!

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

There's always tomorrow. *nodnod*

[sallymn.livejournal.com]

Yay, the cold does have its literary uses, I picked on the current sentinel_thurs prompt and have managed 700 words today! Should be able to keep going tomorrow (there's nothing like fellow feeling, my darling Blair has a mother of a head cold way worse than mine :) as it doesn't have to be very long...

Since when did Sandburg know what was good for him? Jim ignored that question - he'd learned the answer all too long ago - and concentrated on trying to work out how to make this native Patagonian healing tea that he'd insisted his roommate should drink. Turnabout being fair play and all that, and Jim had vivid memories of the times he'd been faced with a dose of one of another of Sandburg's 'miracle natural cures' and a whammy of big worried blue eyes that pretty much forced him to swallow it down.

(The fact that he had equally vivid memories of how quickly said big worried blue eyes turned gleefully inquisitive and questioning the minute Jim was up to being asked how said dose had affected his senses and of the interrogation and request for repeat doses to check the results... never seemed to stop him caving in the next time. Funny that.)

Anyway, Blair was the one who had brought this stuff into Jim's nice orderly life and nice orderly home, and he was the one who insisted it all worked. Blair could damn well swallow his words or his tea, his choice.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Yay, Sentinel! Memories are made of this stuff... you portray the guys really well.

[saki101.livejournal.com]

I went off and wrote a few paragraphs today about John brushing up his draughtsmanship because he saw how impressed Sherlock seemed with Amar's ability to draw the suspect. I don't particularly have any place for that in this story!

I did also revise the complete, plot-moving scene from the other day. Deleted some stuff, swapped a few words around. So, a little snip of that ~

***

“Yes, of course,” Mr Amar said, gesturing to the seats. “I’m shocked, but I suppose I shouldn’t be.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I’ll only be a moment.”

“Forgery,” John murmured, when Amar had left the room.

“Fingerprints,” Sherlock replied.

[espresso-addict.livejournal.com]

Deletion totally counts as progress! John & Sherlock are continuing their double act nicely.

[espresso-addict.livejournal.com]

Well, as soon as I turned my back on the bridging section it wanted to get written, so over 600 new words! It's still quite rough and doesn't quite fit with what was there, but forward momentum! Not a lot of new dialogue, so have a bit of scene description...

...The man roosted in the tower of a crumbling old mansion the new campus had swallowed whole and never got around to digesting. The tower’s marble facing was long gone but I could see why the guy might like the place. His office was an octagon, with tall bookcases taking up four of the walls and picture windows looking out in all four directions. There were four neat little balconies with resident pigeons in case the sun ever made an appearance. If he’d had one of those swivel chairs you could have seen the old town’s red tiles and the grey-blue slates of the commercial quarter and the pale marble towers of the palace perched up on its knoll and the tall masts of the merchant ships docked in the bay, all without bothering to get up. I’d have swivelled round and round and round and never got a shred of work done.

[stevie-carroll.livejournal.com]

Lovely description and characterisation there.

[akane42me.livejournal.com]

Writing late today, but I did it! A busy Saturday.

Tomorrow I must put my writing first or it won't get done. We're going on vacation - I'll have lots of writing time once we get there, but I don't want to take a chance of not getting to it. I have to pack my things and all the supplies while Rick mows the lawn and puts the kayak on the roof of the car. Then we're off to the north woods. No internet access until we return next Saturday, except a horrible G3 connection via my telephone. I'll try to check in each day, at least to wave hello:)

[stevie-carroll.livejournal.com]

Have a good trip!

[candidlily.livejournal.com]

Managed 111 words tonight. It wasn't as productive as I'd been hoping, and I didn't make much headway on the outline I'd been hoping for. Ah well. I spent the day catching up with my parents instead, so it was still a good night. Still planning to play catch-up on the writing tomorrow. (*fingers crossed*)

[stevie-carroll.livejournal.com]

Still progress that there.