ext_27872: (Default)
ext_27872 ([identity profile] el-staplador.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] picowrimo2015-06-24 06:39 am

Pico day 24

Here is the post for any comments, snippets or thoughts.

May the magic be with us all!

Choices made

[identity profile] wiseheart.livejournal.com 2015-06-24 03:23 pm (UTC)(link)
So, after having discussed my options with you wonderful people, I chose to close up the Cadfael story with the summary chapter and the epilogue we were talking about.
Today, I tore up the second version of the beginning of said chapter and started a third one. Below are the two paragraphs of the beginning (of the end):

Excerpt:
Cuhelyn never got Prince Owain’s writ to hunt down Bledri ap Rhys – but that wasn’t the fault of either of them. For while he was putting his gear together and Owain was sitting in council with Hywel and his captains, Gwion and the two Benedictine brothers found Bledri dead in the lodging where the Prince’s steward had housed him.

And not merely dead – murdered. Somebody had first felled him, lashing out with a fist in great anger, and then stabbed him while he had been lying there, stunned from his fall.


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I'm continuing to type up the finished two parts of Terminus, too, and I've just posted Chapter 8 - Data Who (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11209905/8/Terminus) to FF.Net, in case that someone wants to see how the pieces came together. Reviews are welcome, especially encouraging ones. *hint,hint* (What can I say? I have no shame. No, really, I don't.)
Edited 2015-06-24 15:29 (UTC)

RE: Choices made

[identity profile] nineveh-uk.livejournal.com 2015-06-24 08:23 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm glad you've found a way of bringing the story to a close. That's a very neat synopsis of events.

RE: Choices made

[identity profile] wiseheart.livejournal.com 2015-06-24 08:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you. This is the way the rest of the story is planned to go, with very little, almost no dialogue. It will be a break compared with the previous chapters but hey, it allows me to close it, so I'm cool. I just hope I won't need three attempts with every paragraph.

RE: Choices made

[identity profile] saki101.livejournal.com 2015-06-24 10:04 pm (UTC)(link)
I like the way you introduce the fact that Bledri is dead.

Hopefully, it was just the opening that needed three goes before it felt right.

[identity profile] wiseheart.livejournal.com 2015-06-24 11:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh God, I hope so!
ext_422737: uncle hallway (Hallway)

RE: Choices made

[identity profile] elmey.livejournal.com 2015-06-24 10:26 pm (UTC)(link)
An excellent beginning to the chapter, third time's the charm! It makes very good reading.

[identity profile] wiseheart.livejournal.com 2015-06-24 11:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks. :)

Re: Choices made

[identity profile] espresso-addict.livejournal.com 2015-06-25 12:33 am (UTC)(link)
Kudos on being decisive! The revised excerpt reads extremely smoothly.

RE: Re: Choices made

[identity profile] wiseheart.livejournal.com 2015-06-25 03:12 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm glad to hear it, thank you. :)

RE: Choices made

[identity profile] sallymn.livejournal.com 2015-06-25 09:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Yay!!! Good wishes for you and Cadfael!!

RE: Choices made

[identity profile] stevie-carroll.livejournal.com 2015-06-26 09:12 pm (UTC)(link)
Neatly summarised there.

RE: Choices made

[identity profile] jenn-calaelen.livejournal.com 2015-06-27 10:54 am (UTC)(link)
Good luck with the new version!

That sounds like a good description - very vivid and consise description of the murder!