Day 7 (Team July)

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Here is the post to update with any extracts, thoughts, or comments you might have for today.

I'm saying good-bye for a week, leaving you in the most capable hands of elmey until Day 15. Happy writing!

Comments

Gone till November

[ideealisme.livejournal.com]

Wishing wiseheart a good week off and plenty of relaxation. You've done sterling work keeping going for a month and a half. And welcome to elmey!

Now that having been said - my contributions to Pico are likely to tail off a little because I HAVE COMPLETED THE SECOND DRAFT! Did a sprint today and wrote several scenes and thousands of words. I am absolutely exhausted :)

And now for the last extract. Rewind back to 1914. Eva's teacher Shandlin (the guy with the mother) has opinions on Yeats as a poet.



Don't Hold Back, Tell Us How You Really Feel

And of course Mina wanted everything clearly explained and solemnly repeated Eva's every word until it was all Eva could do not to tell her to go away. And then she went away and Eva folded open the dratted thing, just to get it over with -

"Aha, Miss Downey! Loitering in the corridor, I see. This place charges good money to eradicate habits like that, surely?"

Oh go away you too, Mr Shandlin!

"I'm reading a book," Eva said abruptly, just about remembering to add, "sir." Oh she wished he would stop hovering around like a vulture.

"Well I can see that. What is it?"

"Yeats." Eva said. It was the first writer who came into her head. Hopefully that would shut him up.

"Yeats!" he exclaimed. "Oh dear. I really expected better of you. Do you not find him uncommonly irritating? Nothing but self-indulgent, jejune fantasies of kings and roses and unrequited love. I'm fed up of unrequited love: it's boring. It's like reading Swinburne after drinking cheap wine and getting a ferocious headache from the two together. He's nearly fifty and he's still drivelling on with that nonsense. And what's with the 'odorous twilight'? For God's sake if his twilight is beginning to stink that badly, he should open a window, no? Tread softly, my foot. I wish he'd tread on a banana skin."

Mr Shandlin stopped abruptly, perhaps surprised at his own vehemence. Eva could not resist a smile, which made him look slightly sulky.

[...]

Then - oh thank God! - he moved off down the corridor, almost tripping up on a holdall bag badly propped up against the wall. With an exclamation of annoyance, he started to kick it about.

"Why - must - there - be - stuff - everywhere?" he lamented, the bag skidding down the corridor in advance of his foot.

"I think that's Phyllida Smithson's games uniform." Eva called after him.

He turned his head one last time. "It's stuff and it's in my way."

With that parting shot, he disappeared behind the double doors.

[elmey.livejournal.com]

\o/ Well Done!! \o/ Congratulations!! I feel like a proud Aunt having watched you sweat over this for over a year now :)
I wish we could have a real party for you.

I like Shandlin on Yeats and unrequited love--protesting a bit too much, isn't he ;) And poor clueless Eva! It's nice to have this glimpse of them starting out.

Are you going to take a bit of time off before you start the next draft?

[ideealisme.livejournal.com]

Thank you, mrs. I just did a wordcount. Jesus Christ on a bicycle this novel is vastly overweight. My head hurty thinking about it. Yes, I think I will take a week. Partner is urging me to start subbing asap tho! Not sure if ready...

The reason I had to backfill that Yeats scene is because Yeats actually turns up later on and Eva remembers Shandlin ranting on about him - except that Shandlin hasn't said a damn thing about him because I deleted that entire section and wrote a new one. Hence the backfill! To be fair on Shandlin, I think he's for real when he says he doesn't like Yeats, tho their similar states of impecunity might be influencing him slightly.

[elmey.livejournal.com]

Take a week, give yourself a break. You know you're going to be working like crazy on the next draft too once you start.
This is such an amazing achievement though; I think you have something special.

[ideealisme.livejournal.com]

It took me ten and a half months and I wrote hundreds and thousands of new words. I am absolutely shattered now and am going to head for bed and sleep the sleep of the just. Thank you so much for your belief. I cannot overstate how much it means to hear.

[saki101.livejournal.com]

Congratulations! That is fantastic!!

It's strange to think of Eva as a schoolgirl again. The restrictions of it don't suit her at all. Shandlin's rant and his kicking the sportsbag is so funny, verbally and visually.

[ideealisme.livejournal.com]

It's more that she has an unpleasant letter to read and she wants to get it over with, but people keep interrupting her. And yes, Shandlin is definitely the ranty type.

And thank you :)

[stevie-carroll.livejournal.com]

Congratulations!

Now have a well-deserved rest.

[ideealisme.livejournal.com]

Thank you :)

::vanishes behind double doors::

[jenn-calaelen.livejournal.com]

Congratulations on completing the draft! \o/

Good scene! :)

[ideealisme.livejournal.com]

Thank you!

[vilakins.livejournal.com]

I do love Shandlin. How wonderful that the school has a teacher as vital as him.

:)

[ideealisme.livejournal.com]

He's rude, ranty, sarky, supercilious, slovenly in dress, socially maladept and at times downright mean.

I absolutely adore him.