Pico day 19

[el-staplador.livejournal.com]

Here is the post for any comments, snippets or thoughts.

May the magic be with us all!

Comments

Terminus, Chapter 9

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Wow, we are seriously flagging, folks! Or has everyone gone to their well-deserved holidays? Well, I certainly have. We've finished the term today. As a way of celebrating, I wrote 6 pages of Chapter 9 today, which I'm planning to type up tomorrow. So, today's snippet still comes from Chapter 8.

Excerpt:

“And it has just reached the edge of a galactic sector that is densely populated with such life forms,” Dr Crusher whispered in horror. “Oh God, how can we stop it before it performs mass genocide?”

“We can’t,” Worf announced darkly. “We don’t have the means to do so.”

Re: Terminus, Chapter 9

[espresso-addict.livejournal.com]

Ah, you beat me to it! I hope your holidays are very productive for writing.

You've got to the cliffhanger climax! Aie! Is the Federation going to be destroyed? Tune back after the ad break... :) I keep thinking of that crystal matrix thing that threatened Dr Soong's home -- or am I way off base?

RE: Terminus, Chapter 9

[saki101.livejournal.com]

Congratulations, you survived!! What a productive celebration, too!

That's an ominous snip there!

RE: Terminus, Chapter 9

[el-staplador.livejournal.com]

That's fantastic progress! And talk about a cliffhanger...

RE: Terminus, Chapter 9

[stevie-carroll.livejournal.com]

I've had a busy weekend so far, and there's a lot of tension packed into that short snippet.

RE: Terminus, Chapter 9

[sallymn.livejournal.com]

Eeep! That's a wonderfully grim spot they're in...

RE: Terminus, Chapter 9

[jenn-calaelen.livejournal.com]

Terrifying snippet! Hopefully they'll find a way to prevent it!

[espresso-addict.livejournal.com]

Where is everyone? I can't believe I'm first at nearly 10pm! I started a little editing on the next chapter of The Jade Dragon, but got a bit distracted and ending up doing a first lines meme instead -- which reminded me I had 400 words of a WiP from November 2011 in my 'The Lion & the Rowan' series, which was a tongue-in-cheek bit of comedy/fluff about the early days of Lebannen & Seserakh's marriage. And before I knew it, I ended up writing about 1000 words to finish a draft, now tentatively titled 'The Lion's Roar'. Have a snip of the new stuff...

Tenar had enlightened her king about such matters before the royal marriage, though he had not been so utterly ignorant as she’d thought. It was true, when his previous amours had been indisposed they’d sent polite demurrals via their ladies. It was also true that none of the few who’d been privileged to join him for breakfast had ever thrown their shoes at him, one after the other. Lebannen counted back, and sighed with relief when he understood what lay behind the unsheathing of those fierce claws. He sent his man to the court herbalist with orders to have all the willow bark in the palace stores sent to the ladies-in-waiting for his wife’s ease.

[saki101.livejournal.com]

Wow, that turned out to be a productive meander through your files! A whole draft! Well done!

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Yay, Tenar! I love her!

[el-staplador.livejournal.com]

Sounds like a very productive day! Well done on finishing the draft. This is a fun, comically understated, little snippet.

[stevie-carroll.livejournal.com]

Productive indeed.

[sallymn.livejournal.com]

Everyone took the weekend off??

{snicker} I love the elegance and gentle sting in this.

[jenn-calaelen.livejournal.com]

Great progress!

Great scene and it seems like he is very sensible!

[stevie-carroll.livejournal.com]

Managed two chapters of red pen edits in between transferring books from boxes to my new shelves, but I'm yet to type them up.

[espresso-addict.livejournal.com]

Good going! Kudos.

[saki101.livejournal.com]

That's a good chunk of editing! And shelving as well!

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Wow, you had a productive day!

[el-staplador.livejournal.com]

Good work on both fronts!

[sallymn.livejournal.com]

Yay!!! It's always good to know that the old tech (pen and paper) is still so useful...

[jenn-calaelen.livejournal.com]

Good progress!

[saki101.livejournal.com]

There was more socialising than writing this evening, but I did start on the scene where Mycroft goes home. I think there will be another scene between John and Sherlock preceding it, which isn't written yet anyway, rather than continuing straight on from the bit where Red is sniffing at Mycroft's shoes. A very little snip from the very little that got written ~

***
Mycroft leaned back in his chair, arms stretching out to his sides and legs extending until they reached beyond the polished surface of his desk. A small, warm weight slid away. He folded his limbs in again, closed his computer and stood. “Enough,” he murmured, tucking the laptop beneath his arm and plucking his umbrella from its stand. “Enough.”

***

"Out to his sides" or "out to his side"?

[espresso-addict.livejournal.com]

Kudos for getting writing done around the socialising -- that's always tricky. I like the repetition & the hint of rhyme in the penultimate sentence. It feels very neat, just like the protagonist.

I'd probably go with the plural? I'm not sure I'd use 'to' at all -- 'at'?

[sallymn.livejournal.com]

Well, the Sentinel story didn't get finished quite in time, but maybe tomorrow :)

I didn't help myself by deciding (I think it was three in the morning, always a good time for making decisions, no?) that it really did have to be in second person present tense (I like writing in 2nd person, I've found... and even more for these little bits of humour. And I like Jim in 2nd person). So today I edited what I had from 3nrd to 1st and added a bit more...

Maybe it isn't quite that simple to make.

Not if the smell is anything to go by. Not so much jungle mulch any more but graveyard mulch, with more than a bit of the grave occupants through in. You squint at the package again, then at the box it came in, to see if it did mention anything about the ingredients being illegal, immoral, inconceivably awful or just plain deadly.

But of course it doesn't, because Sandburg had worked out early that he has MUCH lower odds of getting any of these 'test' mixtures of his down his Sentinel's throat if said Sentinel has the slightest chance of actually finding out what is mixed up in them. Labels tend to come off and get well and truly lost before there is any chance that you'll be able to use super-or-otherwise vision on them.

[espresso-addict.livejournal.com]

3am is a good time for making creative decisions, I think -- it frees up the creative brain when the rational naysayer is falling asleep. Personally, I like 2nd person present tense, though I don't know if it's plausible to sustain it over a long piece.

Particularly like You squint at the package again, then at the box it came in, to see if it did mention anything about the ingredients being illegal, immoral, inconceivably awful or just plain deadly.

[candidlily.livejournal.com]

48 words on a full con day! And now straight to bed! <3

[espresso-addict.livejournal.com]

I'm very impressed with you managing to write at a con! Kudos.